Adam's in a big boy bed!

Psycho Princess

About 8am today, Ashley came into me and Rob's room and asked which of us had gotten Adam out of his cot.
Neither of us had, he'd pulled one of the bars out of the side of the cot and escaped!

So, we've taken the cot apart and turned it into a bed (it's a cot-bed). Tonight will be his first night in a 'real' bed and I can't stop crying Sad

When Ashley went into a bed instead of a cot it was fine. It was a milestone; he was so ill for so long as a baby that every little thing like that was a major achievement but with Adam it's different.

Yeah, Adam was very ill too and, of course, every milestone is important but it's made me feel so redundant.

After having Adam I was told that I must never have another child as the chances are it would kill me. I went into organ failure as I gave birth to him and it was pretty touch and go. The doctors don't think that I'd make it next time.

If they hadn't said that, I don't think it would have been an issue. Two kids are a handful and I would have probably said that enough was enough...it's just having the choice taken away from you sometimes makes you want it!

Not being able to carry my kids to full term made me feel like a huge failure. Intellectually I know that it wasn't my fault and there was nothing I could have done differently but that doesn't always help.
Thinking positively about it gets me through the day most of the time but some days (especially days like today) I just feel like the worst mother in the world.

As I see the kids grow up it reminds me that I screwed up being pregnant and I'll never have the chance to try again and get it right!

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sat Jul 12, 2014 7:18 pm by Carabas

Think about what you have and how you've been blessed. You're a mother and a mother is never redundant. Smile

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sat Jul 12, 2014 7:23 pm by Trip

Easy to say, hard to do Sad

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sat Jul 12, 2014 10:14 pm by Sue77

Although your body may have struggled to carry your pregnancies to full term it's no reflection on you, or your mothering abilities. We can't help the hand we're dealt in relation to how our bodies work or don't work.

It's probably because Adam is ready to make the transition into a big boy bed that you're feeling this so strongly. He's beginning to grow from a toddler into an young boy and can no longer be classified as a baby. That's a wrench. But don't forget you're a darn good Mum Trip. You have two very happy boys who are growing and developing well - that's down to you. And there is no way you're redundant. Growing boys still need their Mum and the comfort of cuddles. Heck, Imogen and Naomi are 28 but they still cuddle up with me when they need it.

We're going through quite a tough time right now and although she's now 74 and has some pretty serious health issues of her own, my Mum has been amazingly supportive. As a Mum, she will never be redundant, nor will I, nor will you.

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sun Jul 13, 2014 9:48 am by Trip

Thanks hun.

Those are the things I tell myself every day to get myself out of bed but sometimes it's not enough. I have enough medical training to know that it was just 'one of those things' but my depression takes over at times and no matter how well you KNOW something is true, it can be really hard to accept it occasionally Sad

On the plus side I'm feeling much better this morning! Very Happy

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sun Jul 13, 2014 10:27 am by Carabas

That's good to know. Smile

You know I may not say things as well as Sue but as a guy I can definitely say that the most important woman in my life is my mother and I'm not ashamed to admit it. There is something to be said about a mother's unconditional love for her son(s) and although I'm trying my best to be a good son sometimes I feel that there is room for improvement.

In any case I just want to say that a mother is the first woman in a man's life and as such definitely holds a very special place.

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sun Jul 13, 2014 2:48 pm by Trip

You're so sweet hun, your mum's lucky to have you

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Sun Jul 13, 2014 3:34 pm by Carabas

I think she knows that by now. Wink

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Mon Jul 14, 2014 3:51 pm by Sue77

You do just fine Cara!

How are you feeling today Trip?

cat

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Mon Jul 14, 2014 5:22 pm by Trip

I'm ok thanks hun Very Happy

Re: Adam's in a big boy bed! Mon Jul 14, 2014 6:40 pm by Carabas

That's good to hear. Adam's in a big boy bed! 357251

Adam's in a big boy bed!

Adam's in a big boy bed! :: Comments

Adam's in a big boy bed!